Thursday 23 May 2013

Stoner Kitteh


So each time I press a certain key on this board it enters the corresponding alphabet onto this monitor screen before me? Interesting. Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeooooooooooooooooow. Hkuhdasjdwakjdaksjdvdf. I apologise for getting carried away but this board of keys is most amusing. After all, it is not everyday that I get an opportunity to pound my paws on words. Humans are very stern by nature; always commanding me to get off the sofa, the chair, the bed, the table, the just-about-everything. But it's no use wasting my time explaining to other humans the loathsomeness of the humans I live with... furless apes they be. They cannot even sport whiskers, for paws' sake!

In any case, I came on here to meow about something in particular. I have lived several months with this one family that keep calling me "pet" (the nerve of these imbeciles) and I have relished in all the bounties that their little paradise has to offer; from delicious roast chicken to fried fish and CATNIP! Ohhhhhhhh the goodness that is catnip. I suppose cats have something to be grateful for as well.

One fateful night my nose caught the whiff of something good... something I've never smelled before... something that perhaps no cat has ever smelled before... something divine. I hop up the stairs towards the smell, finding myself standing outside a door. The smell was stronger now, my nose almost bursting from inhaling the goodness. I could only wonder what it was: some sort of catnip that gave off such a wonderful smell? I had to find out. I clawed at the door and waited for an answer. No response. I clawed again, harder this time, and waited. Still no response. Curiosity seemed to be getting the better of me but hopelessness overcame everything and I backed away from the door to leave. Suddenly, it opened.

What I saw appalled me; humans breathing fire! I arched my back and ran inside the room to hide under the bed from the abominations these humans had become! Smoke emanated from their nostrils and mouth and an uncontrollable laughter beheld them. I cautiously peered out from under the bed and discovered that the divine smell was coming from the humans. How disappointed I was to find out it was not catnip. One of the humans was holding a paper-pen of sorts with a fiery tip that also produced the same smelling smoke. He placed the other end of the paper-pen in between his lips and sucked it. The result? The human blew out a large amount of smoke - in my general direction to be precise - and I was held in place by an unknown force.

Unable to move and unable to resist, I leaned closer to the human with the paper-pen and deeply sniffed as much of the intoxicating smoke as my little pink nose could muster! Soon, the human passed the fiery paper-pen to the other human. I knew what I had to do. The other human was seated on a bed. Without any second-thoughts I jumped onto the bed with him and breathed blissful smoke. Typically these humans would want me off their bed as soon as I got on. But for some reason they were not at all bothered by my presence not only in their room at night but also on one of their beds. I did not care either way; I only wanted to breathe in more of that smoke!

The events that followed are rather vague in my memory. To the best of my knowledge, I remember myself lying on the floor on my back with my legs pointing at the sky. I was also constantly meowing. It is a blessing that these humans cannot understanding cat-speech for to them it seemed as if a cute cat was meowing for attention. Actually, I was meowing because my little kitty part was tingling and I was longing for a sexy, Siamese pussycat to keep me company that night. Yes, we cats have libidos too.

I would write more about my little smoking adventure with my two humans but I can smell food downstairs. Speaking of food, I finished my catnip last night. =3

Friday 18 January 2013

It's Been A While

Yeah I know, I know! It's been eight months (what's that?) EIGHT MONTHS since I last updated my blog and I do feel a pang of regret for not being regular. But can you blame me when life grabbed me by the collar and told me to pay attention? A lot has happened while I've been absent on my blog and most of it might not even make it here thanks in part to my forgetfulness and the occasional laziness. But have no fear, I will try to post (from time to time) most of the events that have occurred. God... so much has happened that I don't even know where to begin! But perhaps if I made a list of all the months since I stopped blogging up till now and write down a brief sketch of what basically happened in each month I think I'd be able to write most of my life down.

So lets see... my last blog post was published at the start of May of last year. Damn... that is a LONG time ago. Nevertheless, lets get down to making that list!

May 2012 - It's a good thing the list starts out with a month most of us college-going folks are familiar with as exam time so nothing of intrigue really happened besides my final A-Level examinations. The entire month felt like I was trying to make my way through a Wipeout obstacle course with an exam date at the end of nearly every week! But after many trials and tribulations I managed to make it out alive.

June/July 2012 - There's much and more to be said about the months of June and July. But I'd rather save it for another blog post. A brief sketch might not do it justice.

August 2012 - This was when I got my A-Level exam result and, man, was it the worst month of my life so far.

September 2012 -Spent mostly in silence and regular tuition for a subject I didn't do good at in my finals.

October 2012 - Tuition, tuition, tuition! Save for the occasional huffs and puffs here and there.

November 2012 - I've got a love-hate thing for this particular month. At the start of the month I faced what is hopefully the last CIE exam I'll ever have to give and at the end of the month my parents left for Saudi Arabia to perform Hajj (the holiest pilgrimage of Islam). Them leaving meant I had to the whole house to myself (minus my gramps, and my two brothers) for twenty days! I had so much fun in this month.

December 2012 - This was a peaceful month in which I got high nearly everyday either at home or with friends once or twice a week. And one of my good friends also celebrated his birthday party and it felt good to party after stoning for so long. Oh but I had a terrible New Year's Eve this year.

January 2013 - Here we are! Finally. This is the ongoing month and, surprisingly, it's all about family.

Anyway, the list is complete and I will get started on writing posts to better blog about the stuff that did and didn't happen while I was gone. Peace out.

Sunday 6 May 2012

Problems With Modernisation



I hate this world. Well, I don't hate hate this world but I certainly do not like what it has become and what it wants to become. But before I get on with my ramblings I would like to make a few things clear: I am grateful to God for the life I have been given and am thankful that I receive three meals a day, wear clean clothes, and am surrounded by a loving family. I am also not hoping for a big revolution to up and change the times or to be miraculously whisked away into the fantastical world I have idealised in my ponderous little head. No, I am not like that. I intend to live in this world one way or another and I will adapt to the way of life and keep adapting to the ever changing times despite my resentfulness. I know times are changing and that modernisation - no matter how dreaded the word - cannot be stopped and that the world is only about to get shittier. I'm an escapist and, as such, I shall escape into my anger and frustration at the present and ramble all I want here on my blog.

Now, to pick three words to sum up my scorn I would choose the words carefully. Nonetheless, they'd be: industrialism, secularism, and feminism. I will explain each as best I can and I would be grateful if you would stop misjudging me from reading only the words and not reading on about what they really stand for.





Industrialism, or industrialisation, is the name given to that change in society which transforms our way of life into one that is more progress-driven, more individualistic, and more technology-dependent. Ever since the Industrial Revolution the world has seen an immense growth in the usage of technology in everyday life and not just farms and factories and there is now more innovation in the field of engineering and the other sciences than ever before. And while it is true that because of technological innovations we would not be able to cure so many ailments and make better so many lives but the fact remains - we don't really need it. You may think that the world simply cannot work without technology anymore and oftentimes you may have shuddered at the thought of a life without instant communication and mechanised ass-wipers. But that is only what you have been made to believe in. Yes, life is livable without technology and, yes, it can even prove to be better.

Don't get me wrong, though. I understand that times change and since the exile of Adam and Eve mankind has been developing itself to edge out against natural selection. But we were always destined to be the dominant species whether or not you believe in determinism. However, because of unneeded and unnecessary technology we are diverting our time, attention, and resources into something completely useless and doable without. I understand that mechanised transportation has become a necessity, and was perhaps bound to become one, ever since our need to quickly travel to and fro and get the job done. I understand that mechanical help is needed in the farms to mass produce crops to meet with the rapidly growing population. I understand that a man needs his tools and today's tools are technological devices. But the tides are changing and the tables are turning. What we can find in today's modernised world is increased dependency on technology and a gradual decline in our natural prowess. Our reliance on technology is so great that we have created health-related problems that may never have existed had we treated technology as merely a tool and not a medium of everyday life. And even then instead of removing ourselves away from technology or finding natural ways to recover from over-usage of technology we resort to prescription drugs to cure us. We are leaning over a bed of thorns with no support and the chances of falling to our doom are high.

So what is my conclusion? Nothing. There can never be a conclusion to a problem that has no solution unless a huge wind of sensibility sweeps by us. Increasingly more and more people are becoming less outdoorsy and prefer building concrete jungles to litter the earth instead of real jungles. Excuse me while I go outside and breathe in some fresh air. Oh wait... I can't breathe in fresh air anymore because pollution caused by technology has deprived me of this one and true merit good of life.





Now here's something that has been slowly, but surely, creeping its nasty tendrils into society's mind since the dawn of time. Secularism. Originally meaning the separation of politics and religion, secularism has now come to refer to an irreligious society in general. Again, do not get me wrong. Everyone is free to choose what they believe in - whether or not that belief encompasses anything or nothing. And irreligious behaviour is perhaps common among many individuals that hold faith, myself included. There is absolutely nothing wrong in going your way but when society forgets what it was that's when it starts becoming a problem. The fundamental aspect of secularism is to "leave and to be left." According to this a secular person is anyone who could either be a theist or an atheist but leave world-changing or authoritative matters be. It is in the nature of such a person to live amongst like minded individuals and "not comment" on society. But instead what we see is a "movement" of sorts against religious authority and cultural heritages and a change towards the secular life. By trying to bring a change into people's lives or "taking over" secularism (if we can even call it that) is contradicting what it truly stands for.

Secular thought is not something new but the difference between what's happening today and what used to happen in the old days is that secularism was indeed secularised from society in the past. Today, it's trying to take over and bring a "much needed change." It is clearly evident in modern day entertainment how secularism has crept in and is making it's stand against religion. We have cinema and music that focus more on living life to its fullest and individuality instead of remembering religion and culture and partaking in collectivism. Hiding behind the skirts of liberty secular thought has been so well-integrated into the modern man and woman that religious discussions are often avoided even by some religious individuals. Culture and tradition are mainly used as supplements to the tourism industry and religion is generalised into the imagination category so that no one takes it too seriously to give or take offence and to "keep it to themselves."

When in the old days religion, be it monotheistic or polytheistic, influenced politics, education, and entertainment, today it is considered a folly and a disposable part of our lives that is sooner left out due to it's supposedly retrogressive nature. But religion serves mainly as a barrier to human hastiness and a control on our unquenchable thirst to play God. Regardless of which religion is true or false it is an undeniable truth that religious beliefs carve morality and restraint into our minds - something which a secular society would find difficult to accomplish. Morality in a secular society is like hoping your unleashed dog won't run off chasing cars and get lost at night.





How did it ever come to this? Feminism? Seriously? *sigh* I suppose the world needs drama but when society starts to perceive drama for reality things can get out of hand. Feminism, my dear readers, is the radical notion that women are people. What started out as women's liberation, and rightfully so, has ended up into becoming a movement for total female dominance and an end to what we know as "a man's world." Once again, I shall clarify that I am not against women and that gender equality is one of the basics taught to me in my faith (also something that should be common sense). But my problem begins and ends with solely feminism. Yes, feminism used to mean women's liberation, yes, it used to mean equality for women in the workforce. But today, after having its message heard, it has changed into something disgusting.

Backed by governments and, worst of all, the media feminism intends to shun masculinity and replace it with femininity. That's not to say that the elite are creating a powerful ray-gun that would blast every y-chromosome into oblivion. Instead masculinity, the nature of men, is being discarded gradually and absolutely. Labelled as idiotic, unnecessary, and extremely dominating masculinity is perhaps a rare trait among the modern man. Increasingly men are becoming more feminine as the rise of feminism has ensured that the classic man is disposed off. The grit of manhood has given way to metrosexuality as men face difficulties identifying themselves in today's world. While feminism may have given women equal rights to men it has also empowered women with freedoms beyond their handle. Women have literally taken over the workforce as most jobs are given out to women these days because they possess the natural multitasking edge. However, because of feminism women now have several things to identify their womanhood with - as mothers, wives, nurturers, and now as workers. Traditionally, however, men have had only one thing to identify themselves with - as workers. The alpha male is defined as that man with the highest-paying or most respectable career (which would depend on cultural factors). Suicide rates are higher among men and the majority of those suicides are mainly due to either unemployment or dissatisfaction with their jobs. A man lives to provide and work not only for self-esteem but also for his family and when women unnaturally enter the fray and start taking over it only means the classic man has nowhere else to go.

Within that retreat the classic man may delve into the world of femininity and become a metrosexual (increasingly obsessive about fashion, style, clothing, and outer appearance). It is truly a pity to see masculinity die out or convert into femininity. The rate at which female dominance is happening the male gender might even become unnecessary. How? Through In vitro fertilisation of course. Fathers are disposable and not needed as lesbian couples or single mums can birth and raise children on their own. Divorce rates have also seen a sharp incline with the majority of them initiated by women.

Unfortunately, nothing can be done to stop such inevitable dooms. The world is like a tree: tall, strong, lush with leaves and flowers and ripe with fruit. Beautiful. Harmonious. But when feminism tries to replace the fruit with only leaves and flowers the fruit-bearing tree would become useless and counterproductive and imbalanced. When industrialism tries to extend the branches by adding artificial ones to allow for greater space, the beauty and sanctity of that tree is diminished. And when secularism tries to separate the trunk of the tree from the roots to give it freedom it would, instead, only cause the entire tree to fall - the roots are necessary restraints.

Industrialisation aims to deplete the world of it's tranquility and replace it with technology, secularisation aims to remove religion and culture and replace it with individualism and liberty, and feminism aims to disregard masculinity to allow for only one sex to dominate instead of equality. Balance is key. Without the minus the plus is useless. Without evil, virtue cannot exist. Peace out.

Friday 4 May 2012

Tobacco vs Cannabis

Battle of the herbs!

According to Wikipedia, tobacco is an agricultural product processed from the leaves of plants in the genus Nicotiana. Cannabis, on the other hand, is a genus of flowering plants. The two of them have various uses in modern society and are consumed in several ways. But perhaps the most notable form of consumption has to be smoking. Both of them are rolled into cigarettes and smoked (a "joint" is used to refer to a cannabis cigarette colloquially). Today I'll be comparing the two forms of cigarettes and giving my final verdict on which one tastes better/is better.

Origin
TOBACCO: The first people to ever widely consume tobacco through smoking were the Native Americans who had the herb instigated into their culture, religion, and way of life. Tobacco was a widely accepted trade item, then, and was often smoked in "peace pipes" in sacred ceremonies (even children were in on the whole smoking thing). However, the tobacco industry faced tremendous growth after European settlers arrived in the Americas and introduced the practise in mainland Europe where it, too, became a readily accepted trade item. Thanks to James Bonsack the tobacco industry tripled in size due to his invention of a machine that produced cigarettes.

In today's world, tobacco has been condemned a health hazard and trends in the developed world are declining whilst in the developing world they're seeing a steady rise.

CANNABIS: The first notable use of cannabis can be found in the 3rd millennium BC in Central and South Asia (that's where I'm from! :D). Cannabis is also known to have been used in ancient China (as evidenced by a 2,800-year-old, mummified, pot-smoking shaman) and also by the Hindus of India and Nepal some thousands of years ago (and was then known as ganjika).

Cannabis has an ancient history of ritual use and is found in pharmacological cults around the world. It was revered for its psychoactive properties by the ancient Assyrians whose shamans burned cannabis flowers to induce a state of trance. Even good ol' William Shakespeare was a pothead as proven by pipes dug up from his garden that contained large traces of cannabis. In today's world, cannabis has not only been condemned a health hazard, albeit manipulatively, it has also been criminalised throughout various parts of the world since the 20th century.

VERDICT: In this category the verdict will be based on which herb had the most diverse usage in its history. While tobacco was consumed on a large scale it was still, initially, smoked only by the Native Americans and later the European settlers. Cannabis, on the other hand, has been smoked by the Aryans, the Assyrians, the Chinese, the Indians, the Nepalese, and various other peoples from Central and South Asia. Thus, the winner in this category is CANNABIS.

Contemporary Usage
TOBACCO: In the days of yore smoking was mainly associated with masculinity and power and women smoking in public were often associated with promiscuity. In fact, in 19th century Europe and Japan prostitutes would approach potential clients by offering them a smoke. Tobacco smoking also became an icon for capitalism after the American Civil War.

Tobacco is widely smoked throughout the world and it's no secret that the once-great phenomenon could be nearing an end. However, despite efforts to reduce smoking via anti-smoking campaigns, no-smoking zones, and even increasing the tax on cigarettes the trend still sees a whopping 1.22 billion people smoking across the globe, with most of the smokers being men in the developing world. Take a look at the following statistics:

The country with the greatest percentage of male smokers is Russia: 70.1%
The country with the greatest percentage of female smokers is Nauru: 52.4%
Tobacco smoking rates from some of the world's greatest nations are:
  • United States of America: 23.9%
  • United Kingdom: 35.7%
  • Japan: 29.3%
  • France: 31.65%
  • Australia: 24.75%
 The tobacco smoking rate in Pakistan (my own country) is: 21%
CANNABIS: Though prevalent in our society for a long time cannabis smoking never really achieved mainstream success as did it's darker cousin. Tobacco smoking owed its success mainly to doctors, who had a great influence on society back then (and still do). In the old days tobacco smoking was deemed a great stress reliever and healthy for the lungs (oh the irony) while cannabis smoking was almost always associated with either artists (writers, painters, musicians, and playwrights) or pagans. With the rise of the Abrahamic religions (which I'm not saying is a bad thing! >_<) and also the increased awareness of the 'dangers' of smoking cannabis smoking was further shunned.
Today, only a mere 147 million people smoke cannabis annually with the most prominent group of potheads being the Bohemians: a pot-smoking group of writers, artists, musicians, and actors who live only for their work. Despite having had some very famous smokers, cannabis smoking still hasn't gained influence as has tobacco. The following are a few statistics:
The country with the greatest percentage of cannabis smokers is Papua New Guinea: 29.5%
Cannabis smoking rates from some of the world's greatest nations are:
  • United States of America: 13.7%
  • United Kingdom: 7.4%
  • Japan: 0.1%
  • France: 8.6%
  • Australia: 10.6%
The cannabis smoking rate in Pakistan (my country) is: 3.9%

VERDICT: Based on the number of people smoking each herb, TOBACCO is proclaimed the winner by a huge margin.

Health Effects
TOBACCO: Tobacco is the single greatest cause of preventable death globally with 5.4 million deaths attributed to the act of smoking alone. Tobacco use leads to diseases affecting the heart and lungs with smoking being a major risk factor for heart attacks, strokes, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease, and cancer. It also causes peripheral vascular disease and hypertension. These effects depend mainly on how much and how long a person has been smoking and how much secondhand smoke that person has been inhaling (though the adverse effects of secondhand smoke are dubious). Tobacco use is a significant factor in miscarriages among pregnant smokers while also contributing to other effects to a child in the womb such as premature births and low birth weight and increases the chance for Sudden Infant Death Syndrome by three times. Tobacco smoking increases the chance of impotence amongst male smokers by 85% more than non-smoking males and is the main cause of erectile dysfunction.
Basically, tobacco is possibly one of the worst things you can consume for your body and it is truly sad to see such a rampant killer legal and running free on the streets of the world. Bhutan, however, is the only country in the world to have banned the sale of tobacco.
CANNABIS: The active ingredient of cannabis is tetrahydrocannabinol (THC) which gives the herb its psychoactive properties or the "high." Various scientific studies have proven that cannabis contains little to no carcinogens (an agent that causes cancer) and it's long-term health effects have long been debated but none have actually been proven. Of the short-term health effects cannabis smoking can cause impairment of basic sense (which usually just last for three hours maximum) and can cause temporary memory loss. The adverse long-term effects are highly debated but there is one positive effect of cannabis smoking which is popularly agreed upon: smoking marijuana destroys cancer cells and has no links to lung cancer.
Up till now no reported death has been attributed to cannabis smoking and it poses no real threat to one's life. Despite all this, it is shunned in modern society and criminalised in many places.
VERDICT: On one hand you have the extremely poisonous tobacco while on the other hand you have cannabis: a herb which has been used to cure cancer, glaucoma, and AIDS patients. The obvious winner here is CANNABIS.
Why We Smoke It
TOBACCO: People may have varying reasons for smoking tobacco: recreation, increasing concentration (which is a myth, by the way), or peer pressure. I used to be a regular smoker, managing at least a cigarette a day, but now I only smoke during certain occasions. I had two main reasons for tobacco smoking: whilst among friends I smoked to fit in or stand out as the most masculine (honest confessions) but when alone (especially at night) I used to smoke to achieve a certain 'buzz' feeling in my head. You can call it the cigarette-high but it's not intoxicating like an actual high. It's more comparable to a refreshing buzz one gets from drinking caffeinated beverages. However, with prolonged usage that buzz soon fades away and now I never get that feeling from tobacco smoking no matter how many cigarettes I smoke.
CANNABIS: People have smoked cannabis for varying spiritual and religious reasons. The Bohemians smoke cannabis to invoke creativity and the Rastafarians do so to reach a state closest to their god. But perhaps the number one reason people smoke cannabis in today's society is to tap its psychoactive property - in other words, to get high. Aside from its favourable effects on one's health I personally smoke cannabis every once in a while to get high. During that state I achieve a new perspective on the world around me and, honestly speaking, I think of things that I normally wouldn't. As a writer I need to add creative aspects to what I write and aside from sitting in the toilet and going to the gym and spending time at night in solitude I've found getting high to be another effective way of getting my creative juices flowing.
VERDICT: It's clearly CANNABIS.
And the winner of the battle of the herbs is... CANNABIS! :D It has a more diverse history than tobacco, is not fatal to one's health like tobacco, and provides greater satisfaction than tobacco smoking! It only falls short in popularity which it largely owes to the lack of awareness of the benefits of cannabis to the human body and mind.
P.S. I smoke tobacco only when I'm in a large social gathering (usually of five or more people). Such gatherings are rare as per my introverted lifestyle so that ensures I don't smoke that often. In fact, I rarely ever smoke tobacco. Cannabis, on the other hand, is something I personally enjoy (but not crave) and something I indulge in as much as I can (though I'm not addicted). Due to the cost of purchasing and the lack of availability I smoke 'up' only once a week or fortnight. Not a lot, I know.

Saturday 21 April 2012

Just Another Survey

After already having given the Scratch-Off Challenge I came across another interesting survey of sorts on this here blog. I'm going to do my best to write the answers with as much clarity and detail as possible so as not to miss out on any given essentials. And here we go...!


WHAT ARE YOUR THREE GREATEST FEARS?
I hate how the survey begins by asking me my three fears but I suppose I have no other choice but to answer it. Truthfully too... Aside from God, who I love and respect also, my three greatest fears are as follows in no particular order:

1. I'm afraid of heights. I wouldn't mind the everyday two- or three-storied houses but that's as high as I can manage. Anything higher than that and I'd probably have to lie down on my belly to catch a glimpse down below.

2. I'm afraid of flying cockroaches. This doesn't necessarily imply that I'm afraid of insects and all the other creepy crawlies in general. It's just that I get goose bumps everytime I see a bloody cockroach take off; especially when I'm coming to destroy them with my slipper!

3. I'm afraid of my mother's missed calls. Perhaps the greatest fear known to many an outgoing teenager is the more-than-one missed call received from the one they call "Mother." It's just so dreary to think your mum might be hell-bent on exacting a punishment on you for not answering her calls. Even when I'm not out with friends or partying here and there it still freaks me out to see missed calls because I carelessly left my phone on silent mode.

WHAT ARE FOUR THINGS YOU LOOK FOR IN A GUY/GIRL?
I'm going to assume this part of the survey refers to that soulmate I might find some day in my life. One of the ideal traits of my ideal girl would definitely have to be an appreciation for all things exquisite and fine. I'm thinking of a girl who dresses neatly, wears highborn clothing, enjoys fine-dining and formal parties, and possesses that "sass" a lot of guys love in a girl. A lady is what I'm asking. I wouldn't mind if her lady-self had a wee bit of arrogance, pride, and an upper-class attitude. But too much of those and she would just cross the line. The kind I find ideal is one who is modest and humble on the inside but richly and sophisticated on the outside.

Secondly, I'd love a lady who can maintain an upper-class vibe in front of others but who isn't afraid to explore all the wonderful fantasies in bed. Think, a tame cat outside of the house but a wild tigress in bed. To put it simply: complete sexual gratification in one package.

Thirdly, a pretty face. I know most people love their better halves for their personality but it isn't wrong to want sweet candy in an attractive wrapper. I'm not going to nitpick on any of her other womanly features but I would want a face with deep, engaging eyes, and lips in which I could just dive deep into. Sorry for getting carried away but I would want my cat-and-tigress to have a face that would melt my heart everytime I see it.

This last trait might be asking a bit too much but I want a woman who concerns herself more with the nurturing of the house and leave the breadwinning to me. I'm not asking for uncompromised obedience, I'm asking for an old-fashioned woman who hasn't let the times or the society change her. A woman who understands she's a woman and plays the part.

WHAT'S YOUR SEXUAL ORIENTATION?
After reading the above preferences I think you'd find this a no-brainer. But in case some of you might be wondering whether I'm bi-curious or have had any sort of sexual relations with a man then my answer would be, "No, I haven't. And, God willing, I never will. Not even if I'm getting paid."

WHAT'S YOUR HEIGHT?
Eh... I'm 5'7" to 5'8" tall. Yeah, I'm shorter than the average male height and I'm the short one, save for one or two others, among my peers. Both men and women have called me short but I feel I'm perfect for my age. Though a problem sometimes, I get by knowing that I still have seven more years to let my growth hormones increase me an inch or two (or three). And the fact that shorter people gain muscle mass faster than taller ones and kick-ass in a one-on-one encounter are just some of the reasons that help me sleep at night.

WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE QUOTE?
This was actually very difficult to fill in but in the end I had to choose one quote above all.

"A single dream is more powerful than a thousand realities." - J.R.R. Tolkien

WHAT'S YOUR CURRENT RELATIONSHIP STATUS?
Single and ready to mingle.

WHAT'S YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR PARENTS?
I love my parents and cannot contemplate to imagine a world without them. If there is one thing I am certain, above all else, that God has blessed me with is that He has given me a hardworking father and a loving mother. I get along well with both my parents and love and respect them equally. I admire my father for working till late at night just to ensure his children receive a good education, three meals a day, and a roof above their heads. I admire my mother for her enthusiasm and blind love for her children. She would stop whatever she's doing if she finds her children distressed or in pain. She would spend hours sitting beside her children during fevers. All the while she would also play the part of the sister we never had. A family of sons, my mother is both my mother and my older sister. She would laugh at playful jests with us and try to beat our highscore on Angry Birds while not compromising her motherly authority. My father, on the other hand, is not just my father but also my guardian-protector, ever watchful of his sons. He would provide moral and financial help whenever needed and always felt the need to spoil his sons every week with gifts or a family night out.

WHAT'S YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR SIBLINGS?
I don't have a sister and I'm the oldest of three brothers. My two brothers - one being two years younger than me and the other nine years younger -  are to me as the moon and sun are to Earth. I enjoy the company of my middle-brother and frequently engage in bonding sessions like playing a video-game together or smoking shisha/cigarettes in the many cafes dotted throughout the city. Though I don't spend much time with my younger brother his presence is still an essential part of my everyday life. Whenever he's not around the house seems gloomy. He brims with radiance and loud happines - extremely loud happiness. His constant screaming - whether it is because he lost at a video-game, or does not like the food at his plate - is a fundamental addition to the "peace" in the house.

DO YOU AND YOUR LAST EX HATE EACH OTHER?
Actually, no. We're still in touch and are actually better friends than we'd ever hoped to be. I guess a wrong does make a right and the break-up may have actually happened for the better.

HAVE YOU EVER RECEIVED A "GOOD MORNING" OR A "GOOD NIGHT" TEXT?
As a matter of fact I've never received one. I did receive a "good afternoon" text once, though.

HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE YOU TO GET READY IN THE MORNING?
An hour, give or take, during school/workdays and just under twenty minutes during weekends.

DO YOU LIKE YOUR MUSIC LOUD OR AT A REASONABLE LEVEL?
A reasonable level, please.

DO YOU HAVE SOMEONE OF THE OPPOSITE SEX YOU CAN TELL EVERYTHING TO?
No.

HOW OFTEN DO YOU WEAR A FAKE SMILE?
Not that often but I mostly fake a smile whenever someone new is trying to befriend me.

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU HUGGED SOMEONE?
Last Eid.

IS THERE ANYONE YOU TRUST EVEN THOUGH YOU SHOULD NOT?
Nope.

ANY STRANGE PHOBIAS?
Luposlipaphobia - fear of being pursued by timber wolves around a kitchen table while wearing socks on a newly waxed floor.


DO YOU PREFER BEING BEHIND OR IN FRONT OF THE CAMERA?
It doesn't matter where I stand, the camera still loves me.

WHAT WAS THE LAST BOOK YOU READ?
A Game of Thrones by George R.R. Martin, book one in the series A Song of Ice and Fire.

WHAT'S THE WORST INJURY YOU'VE EVER HAD?
A motorbike fell on me once.

ARE YOU A MONEY SPENDER OR MONEY SAVER?
Definitely the saving type. Though I don't shy away from frivolous spending.

WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE ANIMAL?
The tiger.

WHAT WERE YOU DOING LAST NIGHT AT 12:00A.M.?

WHAT'S A SONG THAT ALWAYS MAKES YOU HAPPY EACH TIME YOU HEAR IT?
Concerning Hobbits by Howard Shore.

DID YOU ENJOY SCHOOL?
Yes. I miss those frantic days of carefree frivolity.

WHAT IS YOUR CURRENT DESKTOP WALLPAPER?
A beautiful picture of a wide valley in between two tall mountains overlooking the coast and blanketed with greenery in the Hawaiian island of Oahu.

Well, that's just about it.