Problems With Modernisation

I hate this world. Well, I don't hate hate this world but I certainly do not like what it has become and what it wants to become. But before I get on with my ramblings I would like to make a few things clear: I am grateful to God for the life I have been given and am thankful that I receive three meals a day, wear clean clothes, and am surrounded by a loving family. I am also not hoping for a big revolution to up and change the times or to be miraculously whisked away into the fantastical world I have idealised in my ponderous little head. No, I am not like that. I intend to live in this world one way or another and I will adapt to the way of life and keep adapting to the ever changing times despite my resentfulness. I know times are changing and that modernisation - no matter how dreaded the word - cannot be stopped and that the world is only about to get shittier. I'm an escapist and, as such, I shall escape into my anger and frustration at the present and ramble all I want here on my blog.

Now, to pick three words to sum up my scorn I would choose the words carefully. Nonetheless, they'd be: industrialism, secularism, and feminism. I will explain each as best I can and I would be grateful if you would stop misjudging me from reading only the words and not reading on about what they really stand for.

Industrialism, or industrialisation, is the name given to that change in society which transforms our way of life into one that is more progress-driven, more individualistic, and more technology-dependent. Ever since the Industrial Revolution the world has seen an immense growth in the usage of technology in everyday life and not just farms and factories and there is now more innovation in the field of engineering and the other sciences than ever before. And while it is true that because of technological innovations we would not be able to cure so many ailments and make better so many lives but the fact remains - we don't really need it. You may think that the world simply cannot work without technology anymore and oftentimes you may have shuddered at the thought of a life without instant communication and mechanised ass-wipers. But that is only what you have been made to believe in. Yes, life is livable without technology and, yes, it can even prove to be better.

Don't get me wrong, though. I understand that times change and since the exile of Adam and Eve mankind has been developing itself to edge out against natural selection. But we were always destined to be the dominant species whether or not you believe in determinism. However, because of unneeded and unnecessary technology we are diverting our time, attention, and resources into something completely useless and doable without. I understand that mechanised transportation has become a necessity, and was perhaps bound to become one, ever since our need to quickly travel to and fro and get the job done. I understand that mechanical help is needed in the farms to mass produce crops to meet with the rapidly growing population. I understand that a man needs his tools and today's tools are technological devices. But the tides are changing and the tables are turning. What we can find in today's modernised world is increased dependency on technology and a gradual decline in our natural prowess. Our reliance on technology is so great that we have created health-related problems that may never have existed had we treated technology as merely a tool and not a medium of everyday life. And even then instead of removing ourselves away from technology or finding natural ways to recover from over-usage of technology we resort to prescription drugs to cure us. We are leaning over a bed of thorns with no support and the chances of falling to our doom are high.

So what is my conclusion? Nothing. There can never be a conclusion to a problem that has no solution unless a huge wind of sensibility sweeps by us. Increasingly more and more people are becoming less outdoorsy and prefer building concrete jungles to litter the earth instead of real jungles. Excuse me while I go outside and breathe in some fresh air. Oh wait... I can't breathe in fresh air anymore because pollution caused by technology has deprived me of this one and true merit good of life.

Now here's something that has been slowly, but surely, creeping its nasty tendrils into society's mind since the dawn of time. Secularism. Originally meaning the separation of politics and religion, secularism has now come to refer to an irreligious society in general. Again, do not get me wrong. Everyone is free to choose what they believe in - whether or not that belief encompasses anything or nothing. And irreligious behaviour is perhaps common among many individuals that hold faith, myself included. There is absolutely nothing wrong in going your way but when society forgets what it was that's when it starts becoming a problem. The fundamental aspect of secularism is to "leave and to be left." According to this a secular person is anyone who could either be a theist or an atheist but leave world-changing or authoritative matters be. It is in the nature of such a person to live amongst like minded individuals and "not comment" on society. But instead what we see is a "movement" of sorts against religious authority and cultural heritages and a change towards the secular life. By trying to bring a change into people's lives or "taking over" secularism (if we can even call it that) is contradicting what it truly stands for.

Secular thought is not something new but the difference between what's happening today and what used to happen in the old days is that secularism was indeed secularised from society in the past. Today, it's trying to take over and bring a "much needed change." It is clearly evident in modern day entertainment how secularism has crept in and is making it's stand against religion. We have cinema and music that focus more on living life to its fullest and individuality instead of remembering religion and culture and partaking in collectivism. Hiding behind the skirts of liberty secular thought has been so well-integrated into the modern man and woman that religious discussions are often avoided even by some religious individuals. Culture and tradition are mainly used as supplements to the tourism industry and religion is generalised into the imagination category so that no one takes it too seriously to give or take offence and to "keep it to themselves."

When in the old days religion, be it monotheistic or polytheistic, influenced politics, education, and entertainment, today it is considered a folly and a disposable part of our lives that is sooner left out due to it's supposedly retrogressive nature. But religion serves mainly as a barrier to human hastiness and a control on our unquenchable thirst to play God. Regardless of which religion is true or false it is an undeniable truth that religious beliefs carve morality and restraint into our minds - something which a secular society would find difficult to accomplish. Morality in a secular society is like hoping your unleashed dog won't run off chasing cars and get lost at night.

How did it ever come to this? Feminism? Seriously? *sigh* I suppose the world needs drama but when society starts to perceive drama for reality things can get out of hand. Feminism, my dear readers, is the radical notion that women are people. What started out as women's liberation, and rightfully so, has ended up into becoming a movement for total female dominance and an end to what we know as "a man's world." Once again, I shall clarify that I am not against women and that gender equality is one of the basics taught to me in my faith (also something that should be common sense). But my problem begins and ends with solely feminism. Yes, feminism used to mean women's liberation, yes, it used to mean equality for women in the workforce. But today, after having its message heard, it has changed into something disgusting.

Backed by governments and, worst of all, the media feminism intends to shun masculinity and replace it with femininity. That's not to say that the elite are creating a powerful ray-gun that would blast every y-chromosome into oblivion. Instead masculinity, the nature of men, is being discarded gradually and absolutely. Labelled as idiotic, unnecessary, and extremely dominating masculinity is perhaps a rare trait among the modern man. Increasingly men are becoming more feminine as the rise of feminism has ensured that the classic man is disposed off. The grit of manhood has given way to metrosexuality as men face difficulties identifying themselves in today's world. While feminism may have given women equal rights to men it has also empowered women with freedoms beyond their handle. Women have literally taken over the workforce as most jobs are given out to women these days because they possess the natural multitasking edge. However, because of feminism women now have several things to identify their womanhood with - as mothers, wives, nurturers, and now as workers. Traditionally, however, men have had only one thing to identify themselves with - as workers. The alpha male is defined as that man with the highest-paying or most respectable career (which would depend on cultural factors). Suicide rates are higher among men and the majority of those suicides are mainly due to either unemployment or dissatisfaction with their jobs. A man lives to provide and work not only for self-esteem but also for his family and when women unnaturally enter the fray and start taking over it only means the classic man has nowhere else to go.

Within that retreat the classic man may delve into the world of femininity and become a metrosexual (increasingly obsessive about fashion, style, clothing, and outer appearance). It is truly a pity to see masculinity die out or convert into femininity. The rate at which female dominance is happening the male gender might even become unnecessary. How? Through In vitro fertilisation of course. Fathers are disposable and not needed as lesbian couples or single mums can birth and raise children on their own. Divorce rates have also seen a sharp incline with the majority of them initiated by women.

Unfortunately, nothing can be done to stop such inevitable dooms. The world is like a tree: tall, strong, lush with leaves and flowers and ripe with fruit. Beautiful. Harmonious. But when feminism tries to replace the fruit with only leaves and flowers the fruit-bearing tree would become useless and counterproductive and imbalanced. When industrialism tries to extend the branches by adding artificial ones to allow for greater space, the beauty and sanctity of that tree is diminished. And when secularism tries to separate the trunk of the tree from the roots to give it freedom it would, instead, only cause the entire tree to fall - the roots are necessary restraints.

Industrialisation aims to deplete the world of it's tranquility and replace it with technology, secularisation aims to remove religion and culture and replace it with individualism and liberty, and feminism aims to disregard masculinity to allow for only one sex to dominate instead of equality. Balance is key. Without the minus the plus is useless. Without evil, virtue cannot exist. Peace out.

Tobacco vs Cannabis

Battle of the herbs!

According to Wikipedia, tobacco is an agricultural product processed from the leaves of plants in the genus Nicotiana. Cannabis, on the other hand, is a genus of flowering plants. The two of them have various uses in modern society and are consumed in several ways. But perhaps the most notable form of consumption has to be smoking. Both of them are rolled into cigarettes and smoked (a "joint" is used to refer to a cannabis cigarette colloquially). Today I'll be comparing the two forms of cigarettes and giving my final verdict on which one tastes better/is better.

Origin

TOBACCO: The first people to ever widely consume tobacco through smoking were the Native Americans who had the herb instigated into their culture, religion, and way of life. Tobacco was a widely accepted trade item, then, and was often smoked in "peace pipes" in sacred ceremonies (even children were in on the whole smoking thing). However, the tobacco industry faced tremendous growth after European settlers arrived in the Americas and introduced the practise in mainland Europe where it, too, became a readily accepted trade item. Thanks to James Bonsack the tobacco industry tripled in size due to his invention of a machine that produced cigarettes.

In today's world, tobacco has been condemned a health hazard and trends in the developed world are declining whilst in the developing world they're seeing a steady rise.

CANNABIS: The first notable use of cannabis can be found in the 3rd millennium BC in Central and South Asia (that's where I'm from! :D). Cannabis is also known to have been used in ancient China (as evidenced by a 2,800-year-old, mummified, pot-smoking shaman) and also by the Hindus of India and Nepal some thousands of years ago (and was then known as ganjika).

Cannabis has an ancient history of ritual use and is found in pharmacological cults around the world. It was revered for its psychoactive properties by the ancient Assyrians whose shamans burned cannabis flowers to induce a state of trance. Even good ol' William Shakespeare was a pothead as proven by pipes dug up from his garden that contained large traces of cannabis. In today's world, cannabis has not only been condemned a health hazard, albeit manipulatively, it has also been criminalised throughout various parts of the world since the 20th century.

VERDICT: In this category the verdict will be based on which herb had the most diverse usage in its history. While tobacco was consumed on a large scale it was still, initially, smoked only by the Native Americans and later the European settlers. Cannabis, on the other hand, has been smoked by the Aryans, the Assyrians, the Chinese, the Indians, the Nepalese, and various other peoples from Central and South Asia. Thus, the winner in this category is CANNABIS.

Contemporary Usage
TOBACCO: In the days of yore smoking was mainly associated with masculinity and power and women smoking in public were often associated with promiscuity. In fact, in 19th century Europe and Japan prostitutes would approach potential clients by offering them a smoke. Tobacco smoking also became an icon for capitalism after the American Civil War.

Tobacco is widely smoked throughout the world and it's no secret that the once-great phenomenon could be nearing an end. However, despite efforts to reduce smoking via anti-smoking campaigns, no-smoking zones, and even increasing the tax on cigarettes the trend still sees a whopping 1.22 billion people smoking across the globe, with most of the smokers being men in the developing world. Take a look at the following statistics:

The country with the greatest percentage of male smokers is Russia: 70.1%
The country with the greatest percentage of female smokers is Nauru: 52.4%
Tobacco smoking rates from some of the world's greatest nations are:

• United States of America: 23.9%
• United Kingdom: 35.7%
• Japan: 29.3%
• France: 31.65%
• Australia: 24.75%

 The tobacco smoking rate in Pakistan (my own country) is: 21%

CANNABIS: Though prevalent in our society for a long time cannabis smoking never really achieved mainstream success as did it's darker cousin. Tobacco smoking owed its success mainly to doctors, who had a great influence on society back then (and still do). In the old days tobacco smoking was deemed a great stress reliever and healthy for the lungs (oh the irony) while cannabis smoking was almost always associated with either artists (writers, painters, musicians, and playwrights) or pagans. With the rise of the Abrahamic religions (which I'm not saying is a bad thing! >_<) and also the increased awareness of the 'dangers' of smoking cannabis smoking was further shunned.

Today, only a mere 147 million people smoke cannabis annually with the most prominent group of potheads being the Bohemians: a pot-smoking group of writers, artists, musicians, and actors who live only for their work. Despite having had some very famous smokers, cannabis smoking still hasn't gained influence as has tobacco. The following are a few statistics:

The country with the greatest percentage of cannabis smokers is Papua New Guinea: 29.5%

Cannabis smoking rates from some of the world's greatest nations are:

• United States of America: 13.7%
• United Kingdom: 7.4%
• Japan: 0.1%
• France: 8.6%
• Australia: 10.6%

The cannabis smoking rate in Pakistan (my country) is: 3.9%

VERDICT: Based on the number of people smoking each herb, TOBACCO is proclaimed the winner by a huge margin.

Health Effects

TOBACCO: Tobacco is the single greatest cause of preventable death globally with 5.4 million deaths attributed to the act of smoking alone. Tobacco use leads to diseases affecting the heart and lungs with smoking being a major risk factor for heart attacks, strokes, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease, and cancer. It also causes peripheral vascular disease and hypertension. These effects depend mainly on how much and how long a person has been smoking and how much secondhand smoke that person has been inhaling (though the adverse effects of secondhand smoke are dubious). Tobacco use is a significant factor in miscarriages among pregnant smokers while also contributing to other effects to a child in the womb such as premature births and low birth weight and increases the chance for Sudden Infant Death Syndrome by three times. Tobacco smoking increases the chance of impotence amongst male smokers by 85% more than non-smoking males and is the main cause of erectile dysfunction.

Basically, tobacco is possibly one of the worst things you can consume for your body and it is truly sad to see such a rampant killer legal and running free on the streets of the world. Bhutan, however, is the only country in the world to have banned the sale of tobacco.

CANNABIS: The active ingredient of cannabis is tetrahydrocannabinol (THC) which gives the herb its psychoactive properties or the "high." Various scientific studies have proven that cannabis contains little to no carcinogens (an agent that causes cancer) and it's long-term health effects have long been debated but none have actually been proven. Of the short-term health effects cannabis smoking can cause impairment of basic sense (which usually just last for three hours maximum) and can cause temporary memory loss. The adverse long-term effects are highly debated but there is one positive effect of cannabis smoking which is popularly agreed upon: smoking marijuana destroys cancer cells and has no links to lung cancer.

Up till now no reported death has been attributed to cannabis smoking and it poses no real threat to one's life. Despite all this, it is shunned in modern society and criminalised in many places.

VERDICT: On one hand you have the extremely poisonous tobacco while on the other hand you have cannabis: a herb which has been used to cure cancer, glaucoma, and AIDS patients. The obvious winner here is CANNABIS.

Why We Smoke It

TOBACCO: People may have varying reasons for smoking tobacco: recreation, increasing concentration (which is a myth, by the way), or peer pressure. I used to be a regular smoker, managing at least a cigarette a day, but now I only smoke during certain occasions. I had two main reasons for tobacco smoking: whilst among friends I smoked to fit in or stand out as the most masculine (honest confessions) but when alone (especially at night) I used to smoke to achieve a certain 'buzz' feeling in my head. You can call it the cigarette-high but it's not intoxicating like an actual high. It's more comparable to a refreshing buzz one gets from drinking caffeinated beverages. However, with prolonged usage that buzz soon fades away and now I never get that feeling from tobacco smoking no matter how many cigarettes I smoke.

CANNABIS: People have smoked cannabis for varying spiritual and religious reasons. The Bohemians smoke cannabis to invoke creativity and the Rastafarians do so to reach a state closest to their god. But perhaps the number one reason people smoke cannabis in today's society is to tap its psychoactive property - in other words, to get high. Aside from its favourable effects on one's health I personally smoke cannabis every once in a while to get high. During that state I achieve a new perspective on the world around me and, honestly speaking, I think of things that I normally wouldn't. As a writer I need to add creative aspects to what I write and aside from sitting in the toilet and going to the gym and spending time at night in solitude I've found getting high to be another effective way of getting my creative juices flowing.

VERDICT: It's clearly CANNABIS.

And the winner of the battle of the herbs is... CANNABIS! :D It has a more diverse history than tobacco, is not fatal to one's health like tobacco, and provides greater satisfaction than tobacco smoking! It only falls short in popularity which it largely owes to the lack of awareness of the benefits of cannabis to the human body and mind.

P.S. I smoke tobacco only when I'm in a large social gathering (usually of five or more people). Such gatherings are rare as per my introverted lifestyle so that ensures I don't smoke that often. In fact, I rarely ever smoke tobacco. Cannabis, on the other hand, is something I personally enjoy (but not crave) and something I indulge in as much as I can (though I'm not addicted). Due to the cost of purchasing and the lack of availability I smoke 'up' only once a week or fortnight. Not a lot, I know.

Just Another Survey

After already having given the Scratch-Off Challenge I came across another interesting survey of sorts on this here blog. I'm going to do my best to write the answers with as much clarity and detail as possible so as not to miss out on any given essentials. And here we go...!


WHAT ARE YOUR THREE GREATEST FEARS?
I hate how the survey begins by asking me my three fears but I suppose I have no other choice but to answer it. Truthfully too... Aside from God, who I love and respect also, my three greatest fears are as follows in no particular order:

1. I'm afraid of heights. I wouldn't mind the everyday two- or three-storied houses but that's as high as I can manage. Anything higher than that and I'd probably have to lie down on my belly to catch a glimpse down below.

2. I'm afraid of flying cockroaches. This doesn't necessarily imply that I'm afraid of insects and all the other creepy crawlies in general. It's just that I get goose bumps everytime I see a bloody cockroach take off; especially when I'm coming to destroy them with my slipper!

3. I'm afraid of my mother's missed calls. Perhaps the greatest fear known to many an outgoing teenager is the more-than-one missed call received from the one they call "Mother." It's just so dreary to think your mum might be hell-bent on exacting a punishment on you for not answering her calls. Even when I'm not out with friends or partying here and there it still freaks me out to see missed calls because I carelessly left my phone on silent mode.

WHAT ARE FOUR THINGS YOU LOOK FOR IN A GUY/GIRL?
I'm going to assume this part of the survey refers to that soulmate I might find some day in my life. One of the ideal traits of my ideal girl would definitely have to be an appreciation for all things exquisite and fine. I'm thinking of a girl who dresses neatly, wears highborn clothing, enjoys fine-dining and formal parties, and possesses that "sass" a lot of guys love in a girl. A lady is what I'm asking. I wouldn't mind if her lady-self had a wee bit of arrogance, pride, and an upper-class attitude. But too much of those and she would just cross the line. The kind I find ideal is one who is modest and humble on the inside but richly and sophisticated on the outside.

Secondly, I'd love a lady who can maintain an upper-class vibe in front of others but who isn't afraid to explore all the wonderful fantasies in bed. Think, a tame cat outside of the house but a wild tigress in bed. To put it simply: complete sexual gratification in one package.

Thirdly, a pretty face. I know most people love their better halves for their personality but it isn't wrong to want sweet candy in an attractive wrapper. I'm not going to nitpick on any of her other womanly features but I would want a face with deep, engaging eyes, and lips in which I could just dive deep into. Sorry for getting carried away but I would want my cat-and-tigress to have a face that would melt my heart everytime I see it.

This last trait might be asking a bit too much but I want a woman who concerns herself more with the nurturing of the house and leave the breadwinning to me. I'm not asking for uncompromised obedience, I'm asking for an old-fashioned woman who hasn't let the times or the society change her. A woman who understands she's a woman and plays the part.

WHAT'S YOUR SEXUAL ORIENTATION?
After reading the above preferences I think you'd find this a no-brainer. But in case some of you might be wondering whether I'm bi-curious or have had any sort of sexual relations with a man then my answer would be, "No, I haven't. And, God willing, I never will. Not even if I'm getting paid."

WHAT'S YOUR HEIGHT?
Eh... I'm 5'7" to 5'8" tall. Yeah, I'm shorter than the average male height and I'm the short one, save for one or two others, among my peers. Both men and women have called me short but I feel I'm perfect for my age. Though a problem sometimes, I get by knowing that I still have seven more years to let my growth hormones increase me an inch or two (or three). And the fact that shorter people gain muscle mass faster than taller ones and kick-ass in a one-on-one encounter are just some of the reasons that help me sleep at night.

WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE QUOTE?
This was actually very difficult to fill in but in the end I had to choose one quote above all.

"A single dream is more powerful than a thousand realities." - J.R.R. Tolkien

WHAT'S YOUR CURRENT RELATIONSHIP STATUS?
Single and ready to mingle.

WHAT'S YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR PARENTS?
I love my parents and cannot contemplate to imagine a world without them. If there is one thing I am certain, above all else, that God has blessed me with is that He has given me a hardworking father and a loving mother. I get along well with both my parents and love and respect them equally. I admire my father for working till late at night just to ensure his children receive a good education, three meals a day, and a roof above their heads. I admire my mother for her enthusiasm and blind love for her children. She would stop whatever she's doing if she finds her children distressed or in pain. She would spend hours sitting beside her children during fevers. All the while she would also play the part of the sister we never had. A family of sons, my mother is both my mother and my older sister. She would laugh at playful jests with us and try to beat our highscore on Angry Birds while not compromising her motherly authority. My father, on the other hand, is not just my father but also my guardian-protector, ever watchful of his sons. He would provide moral and financial help whenever needed and always felt the need to spoil his sons every week with gifts or a family night out.

WHAT'S YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR SIBLINGS?
I don't have a sister and I'm the oldest of three brothers. My two brothers - one being two years younger than me and the other nine years younger -  are to me as the moon and sun are to Earth. I enjoy the company of my middle-brother and frequently engage in bonding sessions like playing a video-game together or smoking shisha/cigarettes in the many cafes dotted throughout the city. Though I don't spend much time with my younger brother his presence is still an essential part of my everyday life. Whenever he's not around the house seems gloomy. He brims with radiance and loud happines - extremely loud happiness. His constant screaming - whether it is because he lost at a video-game, or does not like the food at his plate - is a fundamental addition to the "peace" in the house.

DO YOU AND YOUR LAST EX HATE EACH OTHER?
Actually, no. We're still in touch and are actually better friends than we'd ever hoped to be. I guess a wrong does make a right and the break-up may have actually happened for the better.

HAVE YOU EVER RECEIVED A "GOOD MORNING" OR A "GOOD NIGHT" TEXT?
As a matter of fact I've never received one. I did receive a "good afternoon" text once, though.

HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE YOU TO GET READY IN THE MORNING?
An hour, give or take, during school/workdays and just under twenty minutes during weekends.

DO YOU LIKE YOUR MUSIC LOUD OR AT A REASONABLE LEVEL?
A reasonable level, please.

DO YOU HAVE SOMEONE OF THE OPPOSITE SEX YOU CAN TELL EVERYTHING TO?
No.

HOW OFTEN DO YOU WEAR A FAKE SMILE?
Not that often but I mostly fake a smile whenever someone new is trying to befriend me.

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU HUGGED SOMEONE?
Last Eid.

IS THERE ANYONE YOU TRUST EVEN THOUGH YOU SHOULD NOT?
Nope.

ANY STRANGE PHOBIAS?
Luposlipaphobia - fear of being pursued by timber wolves around a kitchen table while wearing socks on a newly waxed floor.


DO YOU PREFER BEING BEHIND OR IN FRONT OF THE CAMERA?
It doesn't matter where I stand, the camera still loves me.

WHAT WAS THE LAST BOOK YOU READ?
A Game of Thrones by George R.R. Martin, book one in the series A Song of Ice and Fire.

WHAT'S THE WORST INJURY YOU'VE EVER HAD?
A motorbike fell on me once.

ARE YOU A MONEY SPENDER OR MONEY SAVER?
Definitely the saving type. Though I don't shy away from frivolous spending.

WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE ANIMAL?
The tiger.

WHAT WERE YOU DOING LAST NIGHT AT 12:00A.M.?

WHAT'S A SONG THAT ALWAYS MAKES YOU HAPPY EACH TIME YOU HEAR IT?
Concerning Hobbits by Howard Shore.

DID YOU ENJOY SCHOOL?
Yes. I miss those frantic days of carefree frivolity.

WHAT IS YOUR CURRENT DESKTOP WALLPAPER?
A beautiful picture of a wide valley in between two tall mountains overlooking the coast and blanketed with greenery in the Hawaiian island of Oahu.

Well, that's just about it.

My Ten Favourite Chuck Norris Factoids

In all honesty there are just too many Chuck Norris factoids, err, facts for me to compile a Top Ten list. But duty calls and the compendium needs to be filled! :P Anyway, it was extremely difficult sorting out which factoid was superior to which so in the end I just decided to remove the order and post all ten of them with equal preference. Oh, and the few that didn't make it on the list have been included under Honourable Mentions.

Top Ten Chuck Norris Factoids

01. When Chuck Norris pokes you on Facebook, you can feel it.

02. Chuck Norris doesn't turn the light on, he turns the dark off.

03. Some magicians can walk on water; Chuck Norris can swim through land.

04. Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life.

05. Ghosts sit around the campfire and tell Chuck Norris stories.

06. Chuck Norris died twenty years ago; Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.

07. There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.

08. Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

09. Chuck Norris does not sleep; he waits.

10. Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number; you answer the wrong phone.

Honourable Mentions

01. Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost.

02. Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy. It's a Chucktatorship.

03. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC claiming Law and Order to be trademarked names of his left and right legs.

04. Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet as Chuck Norris.

05. Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.

The Survivor & The Setter

If there's a keen observation I might have made on this wonderful world of ours and the beautiful people that inhabit it, it's that people can generally be divided into two broad, and distinct, categories. I'm not saying I've made a discovery on the psychological behaviour of why people do things the way they do it, but I've definitely tackled a conclusion all on my own. Regardless of whether similar information may be available on the internet the categories I've come up with are, namely, the Survivor and the Setter.

The Survivor

Survivors are introverted people who, well, survive. Typical characteristics of a Survivor include passiveness, patience, and adaptability. Survivors are people who are generally well-suited to their environment, be it a blistering tundra or a hot desert. A pure Survivor is one who will never alter the environment or the people around him and will, instead, bend his own ways to better suit the changing times. They are peace-loving people known for their neutrality but can also be termed selfish and self-centered by those who may not know them well. Docile by nature they are not too keen on rapid expansion and progress into the unknown and would rather stay at their place of abode and "live and let live."

The perfect example of this kind of behaviour on a marcoeconomic and global scale is the Swiss Confederation, known to the layman as Switzerland. The confederation's foreign policies are entirely peace-driven and Switzerland is popularly known as the nation that never interferes. For the sake of internal stability and external "isolation" Switzerland has managed to make itself neutral from the decisions of the world, more or less. Other global examples include many central European countries (Liechtenstein, Luxembourg, Monaco, etc.), the four Scandinavian countries (Norway, Sweden, Denmark, and Finland), as well as the South-East Asian nations.

On a more personal level the Survivor can be anyone you may know who tends to slip into the background during group gatherings or that person who you may find easy to befriend. Such a person would do anything to avoid confrontation, from offering his chair to fetching your cellular phone and letting you through the door first to listening attentively to your troubles or gains. However, it is practically impossible to find or be a pure Survivor. The essence of the Survivor is to go by unnoticed but in our society of extroverts the Survivor may find it difficult sheltering himself from attention. This only makes sense as the "good listener" would be a popular talk among single women who wish for a passive man. Or the "nice guy" could be extremely popular among his peers for always having money on him or always managing to offer a ride home.

Through this perspective no one is a pure Survivor. Also, Survivors tend to leave the decision-making to the Setters (explained below) but through inadvertent sympathy they have the potential to make decisions without ever realising it. For example, you have always gotten up from the computer whenever your better half asked you to do so. However, one day your better half finally notices (or chooses to notice) your obedience and may reward you by letting you stay on for longer. This way, the Survivor has subsequently behaved like the Setter.

The Setter

 
On the other hand we have society's extroverted decision-maker, the Setter. Typical characteristics of a Setter are nearly opposite to that of a Survivor. I write 'nearly' because, just like the Survivor, no one can be a pure Setter. Back to the point; Setters are people who, instead of letting things go the way they were and changing themselves to better suit their surroundings, would rather change the surroundings to better suit themselves. Just like their name suggests, the Setter "sets" things and organises the world to his liking. Born with aggression and a knack for dominance the Setter will never settle for anything below his expectations. These are the people who are known for their charisma and leadership skills but can also be negatively portrayed as dominating and intrusive.

Perhaps the greatest known example of a Setter on a global scale is that of the United States of America. The federal republic, ever since the nuclear bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, has played a major role in many of the world's following events including the Cold War, the forming of Israel, and now the War on Terror. Their "nosy" foreign policy has ensured them interference, for the better or worse, on interstate matters of various Middle-Eastern nations as well as the Indian Subcontinent. Their intrusive nature also includes, apparently for the better, North Korea and previously the Gaddafi-regime in Libya.

On a personal scale the Setter is perhaps your boss at work or the bully at school. He can also be the annoying sibling who bosses you around or the over-possessive wife/girlfriend who keeps tabs on everything you do. Pardon me, as I have included a great deal of bias in my description of the Setter-types. On a more unbiased note, they are the men and women who shape the future of mankind. Depicted by the great Godfather, Vito Corleone, the Setters tend to play the elitist role of society by giving out orders and controlling the controllers. Again, no one can be purely the Setter type as some decisions are left unmade and under certain circumstances a Setter person may even behave, albiet remotely, like the Survivor person (in that they wish peace).

Well, that's it for my keen observation, if I do say so myself. Interestingly enough this whole idea of Survivor and Setter was purely concocted after I observed the rationale of my younger brother (the middle-child) and myself. Of course, you can clearly see where the bias came from...

Which type do you feel yourself to be?

Winter Has Finally Come!

The second season of the highly acclaimed television series, Game of Thrones, finally aired on April 1, 2012. The series is based off of George R.R. Martin's fantasy novel series, A Song of Ice and Fire, and the first season vividly depicted the events of the first book. Not many film/television adaptations of novels turn out successful or do justice to the books but HBO's David Benioff and D.B. Weiss have managed to accurately display the main events in the book as well as adding minor, detailed events. It's too bad the second season doesn't include Sean Bean but with five families vying for the Iron Throne of the Seven Kingdoms and the White Walkers sprucing up trouble beyond the Wall the second season promises to excel the first in every aspect!

Well, I'm off to download the first episode of season two. Until next time.

P.S. I've changed the blog's background temporarily just to commemorate the airing of the second season of Game of Thrones. :D

The Year In Review: 2011 (pt2)

Now where was I...? Oh yes! I had just finished reviewing the first half of 2011 and was about to continue with the second half when unforeseen circumstances took the best of my time and I had to cut short (that, and the entry was a bit too much to read). I left the last entry hanging at the part when I returned to Pakistan (albeit, reluctantly) from my wonderful trip to Japan.

The timing couldn't have been any better as I returned to Pakistan five days into the Islamic month of Ramadan (a holy month in which Muslims keep fasts). I came home exactly when the Sehri (opening meal of a fast) was about to start. My joyous parents suggested I not keep a fast that day as I was tired (though not jet-lagged) but I insisted on fasting (partly to fulfil a religious obligation, and partly to brag about my endurance). After the opening meal I unpacked and unravelled all the gifts and presents I bought from the Land of the Rising Sun for my family (aren't I a sweetheart?). For my brother I brought a shiny iPod Touch back-cover (with Batman's emblem emblazoned on it), a new PlayStation 3 video-game (Vanquish), and traditional Japanese underwear (he insisted). For my youngest brother I brought a super-cool ninja mask along with a plastic kunai and shuriken, a wooden katana (small size), and an intricate Japanese 3D jigsaw puzzle. Aside from a few boring things for my parents I also bought large bars of Meiji chocolate for everyone! And boy were they delicious!

That was the month of August for me (I also got my AS-Level exam results). September came and went, showing the occasional seasonal symptoms of winter. October started with my birthday on the fourth! ... But, sadly, the month kept me busy with midterm preparation. My friends, too, were busy with either their midterms or their SAT's due in November/December. I didn't mind the come-and-went birthday. Similarly, November was filled busy schedules (tuitions, group-studies, etc.). I know this seems boring (and the following might scare you) but the studying in those months was actually fun - a kind of fun rarely felt. It felt good to surf through the course books, absorbing waves of knowledge, and then pouring it down on revision questions for your own sake. No teacher to guide me; just me and my books all alone wrestling it out. Midterms followed soon after and as soon as they had finished, the planning and organising of a friend's birthday as well as a party on New Year's Eve began!

On the 23rd of December I went to a popular beach in Karachi known as Hawk's Bay. Unlike Sea View (a beach located in the city), Hawk's Bay was a two-hour drive from my house and was situated in a relatively isolated place - all the better. The beach also has crystal-clear waters and clean sands (save for a few thorns and plastic bags - that's Karachi for you). Dubbed the Beach Party, my friend's birthday party was a blast! With only five guys (including me) and fourteen girls we partied for a good five hours. The hut we rented was two-storied and had a great interior (an unkempt kitchen and a living room of sorts). Everyone spent the first hour inside the hut; getting beach-ready, listening to loud music on the stereo, and trying to puff out O's with smoke-rings. After that we fled for the warmth of the sun and the cool of the sea water. Initially, us guys didn't wish to get wet but the girls took advantage of their greater number and reeled us in like fishing poles. After a long while of splashing in the water (and playing Marco Polo) as well as lying on the hot sand under the sun, we retreated back to our hut and popped some bottles.

The birthday boy treated us all to several bottles of beer and a large bottle of scotch. ^_^ It was hilarious seeing everyone else get drunk (I managed to not overdo it) and it was even funnier when everyone entered the shower room to clean themselves from the sand. The beach party was a hell of a lot of fun and it was a shame that New Year's Eve wasn't half as much fun. Originally we planned to attend a dance party that started at 11PM and lasted all the way till 6AM. It got cancelled only because stags (single men, sometimes even women) weren't allowed. We had dates... only they had permission issues. <_< Instead we ended up going to a diner (just the boys) and feasting till midnight with the final countdown to 2012! :D

And, thus, ended the wonderful year of 2011. A year that brought lots of joys in unexpected places (:P) and different turns for the better. Looking forward to a hopeful new year.

The Year In Review: 2011 (pt1)

I remember the year 2011 like it was only yesterday...

Good riddance 2011, and hello 2012! Although I have to admit last year was one of my most productive and happiest years yet. I'm going to start my new year with a review of the previous year's ups and downs.

2011 started like any other year: gunshots and rounds of ammunition fired at the sky by enthusiastic celebrators of the new year, or perhaps troublemakers (and many other profound names) with no sense of discipline according to my grand-daddio. But who could've guessed that 2011 would be the year of accomplishments for me? Going chronologically, the past year had started off with the reopening of college after a short-lived winter break. Aside from the dreaded first day of school the year began with many students' worst nightmare: result day. Thankfully, however, the results weren't of our final term examinations but of mere midterm exams which hardly anyone takes seriously (including the college itself). But if there are any organic entities existing in this world of ours who would take a midterm result more seriously than someone's dire death its got to be my dear parents. My oh-so-dear parents who would flare up at the sight of a "B" grade (and don't even think about what they do if its any lower).

My results came in and they were surprisingly decent: straight C's in three A-Level GCE subjects (they're mighty tough) and an A in English (an extra subject given simply for tehlulz). My parents know what to expect from me in English so they take any other subject by the collar until I don't perfect it. So, skipping the part where they erupted like Mt. Vesuvius on me after I proudly showed them my above-average midterm results, lets get on with the rest of the year in review!

Like any volcano my parents' anger softens up into tolerance of my existence within mere days (it used to be weeks, and even months, when I was littler). Life went back to the way it should be: college in the morning on weekdays, playing video-games throughout the afternoon, attending any scheduled tuition programs, and finally ending the day with either a film-night or reading a favourite book in the peaceful solace of my humble abode. I make time for my social circles in the weekends: hanging out with a large group of multi-dimensional friends at a popular eatery/gaming zone/cinema; inviting a closer group of a few friends over at my house for dinner/multiplayer video-game sessions/mere conversation; or even spending some intimate time with a certain someone. My life's pretty much an average who-gives-a-shit.

After my Mock Final Examinations ended horribly in March my time was mainly spent on preparing for the actual Final Examinations in May which go all the way till June. I'm sure nobody's interested in reading about exam preparation or even how a student fights his way through the battlefield of academics to finally achieve his/her ultimate goal: freedom (temporary but, hey, gotta' count the blessings in life too). Sadly, however, my summer break started with a breakdown in my preferred video-game console of choice: Sony's black behemoth, the PlayStation 3. Due to overuse, all-night downloads, and frequent power cuts (something of a routine in my city), not to mention tipsy voltage, my PS3 finally died on me to the dreaded Yellow Light of Death (I'm sure any gamer can identify with this not-so-common console failure). I would have proposed a proper funeral but decided not to since the console made for a very expensive-looking decoration piece.

All was not gloomy for my summer break meant one very important thing: a trip to Japan! I had been wanting to visit the Land of the Rising Sun ever since I was a wee-lad. The fondness ("obsession" according to some) sprouted in me after I grew an unstable likeness to Pokemon's animated series. Eventually growing out of the craze (but mostly because Misty was dropped out of the series - WTF!?) my interest in Japan evolved into many other things: culture, history, mythology, anime/manga, video-games, technology, language, and to a certain extent the girls (Yellow Fever, anyone?). Anyway, my dream was finally materialising and I could finally hurl a "Ha! I told you so!" at the faces of all those family members who ever doubted my goal! Reaching out to the Consulate of Japan to make me a tourist visa wasn't an easy feat (being Pakistani, I face various disadvantages in getting visas) and Osama bin Laden's apparent death in Abottabad (some city in north Pakistan) didn't make things any easier! But after some rigorous petrol-burning to and from the Consulate, signing some papers, and giving an interview, I finally got my tourist visa.

I went to live in the city of Sapporo (situated in the island of Hokkaido - north Japan) with a dear friend. I stayed in the country for a month; experiencing its culture, weather, people, lifestyle, and attractions. Also, the locals have a kind of friendliness that defies the norm. I never felt homesick over there but in fact missed it when I returned to Pakistan - my birthplace. I also got to stay in Tokyo for two days and two nights before my departing flight! ^_^ I'd love explaining my entire trip but a subject so wide deserves an entry of its own. Perhaps if I get the time I'll write all about it (with pictures!) later.

And so ends Part One of my review of 2011, a year we all knew and loved. I'll make some time later to post about the second half of last year (August to December) in vivid detail. I wish you all a Happy New Year! May 2012 be a year of solutions and opportunities.